Toujours pur and whatnot. I'm 26, sarcastic, a bit crass, and completely unapologetic. I obsess over makeup, nail polish, breasts and cooking/baking. I live in Florida, and I can't wait to get the hell out of here. A man once said to me, "Nothing good could come from something so pretty" ... And he was right. Follow me. Don't. It's a little irrelevant, I suppose. NSFW.

16th April 2014

Photo

Mine. #fatdontcare #sixmonthstoworkitoff #personal

Mine. #fatdontcare #sixmonthstoworkitoff #personal

Tagged: fatdontcaresixmonthstoworkitoffpersonal

16th April 2014

Link reblogged from Fucking Florida with 82 notes

How Lending A Friend Your Car, Then Going to Bed Can Land You a Life Prison Sentence →

16th April 2014

Photo reblogged from We're all stories in the end... with 133,535 notes

Source: thecraziethewizard

16th April 2014

Post reblogged from sharon needles called me cool once with 212,995 notes

vardaesque:

today at work a little girl and her dad came through my line and she picked up two things of altoids and she was like “daddy let’s get the same flavor! so when you’re in afghanistan i can eat mine and you can eat yours and we can be together!” and me and my cashier just stood there like DON’T CRY DON’T FUCKING CRY DON’T BE A BABY AND FUCKING CRY

and then they left and we fucking wailed like children

Source: urulokid

16th April 2014

Photoset reblogged from sharon needles called me cool once with 380,221 notes

draelogor:

darkchocolateandtea:

fuckingconversations:

teamfreekickass:

spiffypop:

thebraveandmischievous:

housetohalf:

mysnarkasm:

When I grow up I want to be Ming-Na Wen.

She’s the voice of Mulan, as if she wasn’t amazing enough.

She broke it with her fingers. Not a fist, her fingers.

Girl is 50 years old.

FIFTY. YEARS. OLD.

fun fact: When you break things with your hands like that you have t break your fingers on purpose before so that they heal stronger. So basically this woman is so badass she broke her hands just to do this. 

You asshat, you’re making it sound like she snaps her fingers in half. 

Martial artists like Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee (and yes, fucking Ming-Na Wen, that beautiful badass) will build up their bone strength by repeatedly (and fairly gently) striking sand, gravel, wood and steel - this creates tons of microfractures in their bones (smaller than even a hairline fracture) so the bones will heal over again and make the bones stronger and denser with increased deposits of calcium. 

This has to be done over long-ass periods of time, so the bones have time to heal, and none of the fractures expand into actual breaks. 

Oh, and she’s doing precise-ass kicks in HIGH HEELS. 

she kicks ass like a coursing river

with all the force of a great typhoon

Source: mysnarkasm

16th April 2014

Photoset reblogged from Fall down the Rabbit hole...and into my world. with 182,901 notes

Source: tastefullyoffensive

16th April 2014

Question reblogged from Fall down the Rabbit hole...and into my world. with 89,116 notes

Anonymous asked: how do you give a girl an orgasm?

sexience:

Omg I’m dead

Source: sexience

16th April 2014

Photoset reblogged from We're all stories in the end... with 1,070 notes

Source: texts-from-the-brownstone

16th April 2014

Photoset reblogged from We're all stories in the end... with 5,248 notes

Source: andersondaily

16th April 2014

Photoset reblogged from We're all stories in the end... with 5,285 notes

Source: risesoftheguardians

16th April 2014

Photo reblogged from sharon needles called me cool once with 84,071 notes

brokenquill:

The second worst burn that Two Face has ever felt.

brokenquill:

The second worst burn that Two Face has ever felt.

Source: i.chzbgr.com

16th April 2014

Photo reblogged from Live The Stylish Life with 4,086 notes

Source: bitchcoven

16th April 2014

Photo reblogged from Live The Stylish Life with 94,742 notes

byrongraffiti:

Scott is the realest nigga alive.

byrongraffiti:

Scott is the realest nigga alive.

Source: scottdisickpage

16th April 2014

Photoset reblogged from Live The Stylish Life with 622,894 notes

liftedandgiftedd:

fantasized-perfection:

I don’t know what this is but I love it

this show is actually hilarious.

Source: brewkie

16th April 2014

Post reblogged from sharon needles called me cool once with 155,565 notes

Nice things to whisper when hugging someone

yogurtville:

-you smell different when you’re awake
-please help me (then smile as if nothing happened)
-soon
-you have lovely skin, I can’t wait to wear it
-your hair tastes like strawberries
-tonight….you.
-he knows, don’t go home.
-I always knew you would die in my arms
-every time I poop I think of you
-no one will ever believe you
-yessssssssssssss
-I killed mufasa
-I bet you didn’t feel me lick your ear
-mother told me it would be like this

Source: yogurtville